Something interesting took place when working with my most recent trainer. The feeling occurred when we first began training. Then, I had begun working with a trainer under him. After a couple months of working with the second trainer, inside a big box gym. I found myself back with the original trainer, I had been working under. On both occasions, something strange happened to the feeling of my body. Something I hadn’t experienced before in my life of fitness. Following the training sessions, my body felt interconnected. As a person challenged with cerebral palsy, my body had never found such a sensation. I recall the emotion vividly following our initial training session. On my drive to get coffee the following morning, my body felt connected. A feeling that seemed to originate throughout my back. Like it was radiating outward from my spine. I explained this new found feeling when our next training session began. As he relayed to me, I wasn’t alone in experiencing the feeling. Another new client, coming over from our previous trainer, was experiencing similar sensations. The difference being, he was typically developed and I had a disability. The experience went in complete contrast of the physical feelings inside my body, happening for my entire life. My emotions about the workings of my body seem best described as discombobulated. Nothing seems to feel connected in any major form. It feels like when I make one physical movement, everything else goes bonkers. My entire upper body often feels like it’s walking through a dark room, trying to find the light switch.
It feels like all trainers have looked for ways of improving the challenges of my disability. Wanting to help my body function in an improved manner. Having worked with five different trainers at this point. The experiences seem to provide a window into the approaches that have felt better for my body. Each had an idea, which lead to improving an area. But, the concept might not have made my body feel solid. Working to improve coordination, through unweighted movement, felt like the major concept of two, out of the five. As for the other three trainers, they believed in adding weight to movements. The adding weight approach has been the plan of my most recent trainer. The person who has led my body to feeling put together after the initial workout. The feeling has occurred on two different occasions. Which, has me feeling even more validity to his plan. I can understand the other approach to training someone with my disability. The seeming idea of working more dramatically on the coordination of movements. Utilizing lighter weight load or no weight load at all, and going through different motions with my body. Out in the world, I don’t often walk around with weight. So, learning to move like I would in life, does seem to make sense. I didn’t realize until recently, the approach of not weighting exercises, was adding to the feeling of my body being disjointed. Adding weight to my exercises was crucial to improvement.
When working with the third trainer. My body had wondered a distance away from the weighted concept. Though interestingly, we had begun by weighting upper body movements. As time when on, in our working together. The sessions moved further and further away from the weight lifted by the upper body. We seemed to work most exclusively on body coordination, without placing much weight on any of my lower body movements. Which, had been consistent throughout the years of working together. The training sessions slowly moved into working agility movements up and down the floor. We began playing games of catch with different athletic balls of varying sizes and weights. Each session was geared toward the coordination of my limbs, away from the strength of the middle of my frame. To be honest, I rather enjoyed the new approach. It was fun to play catch and move around in different directions. Geared to raise my heart rate to some degree, making me feel like I was working out. The path felt like it was working and I was willing to hang in on the process, as we moved into the balanced crab crawl. Things started breaking down when holding my balance on the crab crawl wasn’t working. The falls from the position resulted in uneven hips and chiropractic adjustments. Resulting in some of the worst pain felt, throughout my back. When a new training philosophy came along, things started changing in my fitness.
The feeling of being put together seems to come from the middle of my body. Radiating out to the limbs of my body, in the improvement of coordination movements. The efficiency of my movements, feels like they originate from the middle. Strengthening my core, back, shoulders, and chest, helps the coordination of my limbs. This feels like the information I have found in working with the new trainer. It could be a strong reason for the feeling in my body, following our initial workout, and the second time, following a gap in our working together. The feeling of my body being solid was something not felt previously. I can recall it being experienced as something strange happening inside. After the years of working with a body that felt in different pieces. Since those initial workouts with the fifth trainer of my fitness journey. My body had continued to progress. Building on the first feelings of new stability. The training sessions have progressed into movements not done before this series of workouts. As major exercise movements have come into the training. I have become capable of working on the barbell bench press. Which, hasn’t been much of a focus since my early years of college. When, I really didn’t know what I was doing. Another fascinating movement to have achieve, has been the straight bar deadlift. A complicated looking movement, not seeming possible in my past.
The specific feeling of my body being put together brought a cool emotion. Feeling like the trainer I was starting to work with, might have brought something new. A form of working with my cerebral palsy I hadn’t experienced. The real sign would be experiencing it show up in my daily life. I was hoping to notice a difference in something I had done before our work began, then after training with him a few sessions. The proof within my body, which told my brain, I wasn’t just imagining the feeling of being physically connected, came on the ski slopes. The beginning of my working with a new training happened in February. Right in the middle of the winter ski season. The first part of my year on skis had been similar to the previous. I continued spending most of my time on the beginner slopes. While, dabbling in the intermediate runs a couple times, where fear remained on the more challenging runs. As work with the new trainer got going. It took about two weeks for my improvement on the slopes to become clear. The stability I was finding on my skis was something I couldn’t remember, previously. Suddenly, I was spending more and more time on the intermediate ski slopes, gaining better stability with my turns. My skills of skiing elevated quickly, during the remainder of the season.
When the change in trainers occurred, I was apprehensive. Like most changes happening in my life it was challenging to know what to expect. I was blessed to have found another trainer without much time elapsing. As we began, I noticed one large difference with the new training style. There was weight added to most every exercise we performed. It was a large removal from the mostly body weight movements I had been engaged with doing. The emotions following the first couple sessions had me thankful for the new philosophy. The addition of weight to my movements was making my body feel whole. A concept which has seemed challenging to achieve with my cerebral palsy challenges. When the new stability in my body showed up in physical activities, I felt amazed. The addition of weight to my movements. Along with the type and order of those exercises, was making a large impact. With the entire scenario in my fitness level changing in just a couple weeks. The foundation seemed to be created rather quickly and my ability to ski shot upwards, immediately. The feeling of by body being put together wasn’t imagined. The stability and connectedness were real and have continued to grow. It feels important to understand trainers with a hesitancy to load an already challenged physical body. However, it has been a wonderful change to find someone with the knowledge to put weight in my hands.
A Journey With Cerebral Palsy 